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Raw is live from Tampa, FL tonight and Yankee outfielder Johnny Damon is our guest host. Johnny made a somewhat weak entrance on the mic. He gets some heat from the Tampa fans because of being a New York Yankee. Johnny did capitalize on that by taunting a little about the fact that he has 2 World Series rings with rival teams to the Tampa Bay DevilRays.
He mentions the secret Santas and that someone will get their wish tonight. A woman chasing someone around with a tiger suit makes their way through the crowd and into the ring. It’s an odd segment that Damon says he didn’t sign on for. He throws it to the first match and says “let’s get started with the Divas”.
First match is a six woman tag – Gail, Kelly Kelly, and Melina against Maryse, Jillian and Alicia Fox. There’s lots of back-and-forth in this match. Kelly Kelly gets the pin for her team with an assist from Melina. Honestly, I didn’t pay a lot of attention to the match as I was distracted by a phone call.
We’re told that Santa is going to grant a superstar a wish tonight sometime during the night. Also, Hornswaggle’s taking DX to court tonight.
We get a promo for tomorrow’s ECW, which will feature Jack Swagger against Yoshi Tatsu.
DX is in Little People’s Court today. DX has a note in hand, being told to go out to the ring. They go out to the ring, and Shawn says they have to crawl under the ring, because that’s where ‘Swoggle is. Trips says it’s crazy dark in here, but Shawn’s got DX glowsticks, of course good for a shameless merchandise shill. They look around and find a light switch and they’re now in a hallway.
They follow the hallway and discover a room labeled “The Little People’s Court”. DX goes in, deciding to “get this over with.”
They find a jury of midgets, and a midget Judge Judy orders them to sit down. They bicker over the size of the chairs only to have a midget bailiff whip them in the leg to make them sit. Hornswaggle comes in, and rants about suing for distress, showing a video clip of various past Raw segways involving DX and ‘Swoggle as his Exhibit A. Trips says “this looks bad” and they break from it.
Out to the arena, we are greeted with Randy Orton’s music. Up next is a six man tag with Legacy and Orton vs. Kofi, Mark Henry, and Evan Bourne. We’re reminded that Cena beat Orton for the Superstar of the Year last week. Cole tells us also that with Cena not holding the title, Orton is back in the title picture. We’re also reminded that Legacy beat Kofi and Evan last week in tag action. Cole says Kofi’s match with Orton at TLC showed he is on the same level.
Henry starts off with Orton, and Orton immediately blind tags Rhodes in. DiBiase tries to get involved to double team Henry, but that didn’t work. A press slam by Henry on Rhodes and then he tags in Kofi. Kofi with the quick feet and kicks but misses a leap into the corner. Rhodes tags in Orton and we go to commercial.
Come back from commercial and Rhodes is in control of the match. Rhodes goes for a belly-to-back but Kofi lands on his feet and makes the tag to Bourne. Bourne takes out the other two Legacy members with a dropkick but Rhodes stops his momentum and goes for CrossRhodes. Bourne counters and goes for AirBourne and gets a near fall but DiBiase breaks up the pin. Orton levels Bourne, and Rhodes covers for 2. Orton is tagged in and greets Bourne with a right hand and stomps at the ropes. Orton gets a hard slingshot off the bottom rope that he turns into a two count. Frequent tagging by Legacy, as Orton gets a tag to DiBiase . DiBiase hits a long vertical suplex for two. DiBiase stays on the offense with kicks to the midsection and a side headlock that Bourne fights his way out of. DiBiase scores with a huge clothesline that turns Bourne inside out for two again. Bourne runs DiBiase into the corner and a hits a kick to the head. Bourne needs a tag badly and finally gets one to Kofi and DiBiase tags Orton at the same time. Kofi hits a kick off the ropes and then the boom boom drop. Rhodes gets nailed by Henry during that pin attempt. Kingston hits DiBiase with Trouble in Paradise for the win. Orton can’t believe it.
We go backstage where Johnny Damon is with Santa and some Divas. Carlito approaches Eve, who is getting some eggnog. Carlito asks “What’s cooler than eggnog? We’re under mistletoe.” Carlito puckers up to kiss Eve and she makes a face and walks off. Masters gets involved, and then Santa approaches Carlito and Masters. Santa says “if you two want to fight, do it in the ring.”
Santa’s revealed to be Sgt. Slaughter. Carlito says “you can’t make matches, you’re not in charge” and Damon steps in to make the match official. Damon and Slaughter realize they’re under the mistletoe and Damon says “no way, and that’s an order.” Slaughter tosses out the “don’t ask, don’t tell” line. The conclusion of Little People’s Court is after the commercial.
We’re going to find out about DX’s discretions. Triple H says it’s a little misunderstanding and all the while there are lots of “little people” jokes. Now we get Exhibit B, which is when Hornswaggle gets pedigreed by Triple H. Shawn goes on some rant about having to do something big if ‘Swoggle wants to be part of DX. The little people revolt and DX escapes. We see them crawling out from under the ring saying “that was freaky”. HBK gets pulled back under the ring but Trips saves him and they bolt from the ring.
Up next, John Cena takes on Jack Swagger.
Friday night is a Smackdown Christmas special. The card will feature Mysterio v. Undertaker and DX vs. Hart Dynasty for their respective titles.
Coming back, we get a recap of the emotional promo where Cena says he will not lose again until he wins the title back. We also get a recap of the match between Cena and Orton for Superstar of the Year.
Cena comes out for his match with Swagger to a pretty big pop. Cole and King recap the promo from last week and let us know that his back is to the wall as he tries to regain the title. Swagger is out next and is doing pushups in the aisle. Swagger was the last person that said he was going on an unbeaten streak and we all know how that turned out. Cena’s loss gave everyone hope and made Swagger hungry. If Swagger wins, he gets into the title picture.
Tie up and some amateur moves from Swagger. King says Cena’s no slouch in the ring. That’s news. Swagger turns it to a physical game, bouncing Cena’s head off the turnbuckle and stomps to the gut, followed up with a choke move with the knee to the throat. Swagger’s taunting a dazed Cena. Cena with a bulldog off the ropes and tosses Swagger out as we go to commercial.
Swagger took control during the break with action on the outside, throwing Cena into the barrier. Swagger with a submission hold, Cena breaks it but gets planted by Swagger. Swagger with pushups to taunt and he’s just wasting time here. Swagger with clubbing blows in the corner. The road to Wrestlemania started last week for Cena, so he’s under pressure. Swagger whips Cena to the corner but Cena moves before the follow up splash. Swagger hits a side slam for a two count and goes into a rear hammerlock. Swagger’s showing off his mat wrestling moves. Cena is trying to power out but Swagger gets an armdrag takeover and goes back to that nelson-like hold. He’s trying to wear Cena out.
Cena powers out and hits a belly-to-belly for 2. Swagger is whipped to the corner but gets a knee up on Cena’s follow up charge. Swagger gets a leg drop. King says the longer it goes it favors Swagger. Swagger goes for a running splash-like move off the ropes for a near fall and Swagger can’t believe it. Swagger’s confident though and tries to go for the gutwrench powerbomb but is backdropped by Cena.
Cena hits a pair of shoulder blocks off the ropes, and then his side slam. You know what’s coming next…you can’t see him and it’s five knuckle shuffle time. Cole says it’s vintage. Cena goes for the Attitude Adjustment but Swagger gets a great counter into a slam for a two count. Swagger backs Cena into the corner, and then puts him on the ropes. Looks like Swagger wants to hit a superplex but Cena breaks his grip. Cena slams him backward off the ropes then goes for his leg drop off the ropes but Swagger moves. Swagger goes for the splash he hit earlier again and misses. Cena locks in the STFU, and Swagger taps out.
For a Cena match, it wasn’t all that bad. Swagger actually looked pretty good in a losing effort in my mind.
We go backstage with Johnny Damon again. He’s talking to a Secret Santa and tells him he’ll be fine no matter where he ends up in 2010. Santa is now Dusty Rhodes and he’s thanking Damon for bringing 27th title to the Yankees. MVP interrupts, and he wants to make 2010 the year of MVP. He wants a chance to earn a title shot, and wants to face Sheamus tonight. Rhodes says that he isn’t Santa but he knows the man who can make it happen. Johnny Damon comes back into the picture and says that MVP vs Sheamus is on for tonight. Dusty discovers the mistletoe and says “ho ho ho” as they go to break.
Carlito is up next in one-on-one action against Chris Masters. We get a recap of Matt Hardy accepting the award for Extreme Moment at the Slammys. While Hardy was accepting the trophy for his brother Jeff, Carlito punched out Matt. Masters then put the Masterlock on Carlito. Masters is out next to a mixed reaction. I think people were more interested in Eve than him. We get the first mention of the night of the Damon Foundation under Masters’ entrance.
Masters goes for the Masterlock quickly but Carlito gets to the ropes to break the attempt. Carlito gets a sleeper hold on Masters. Cole’s thrilled about Eve sitting on his side of the announce table. Masters picks up Carlito on his back and slams him into the corner. He goes for the masterlock again but gets a chin buster for his troubles. Carlito goes for the Backstabber and misses. Masters gets Carlito in the Masterlock for the submission win
Cole says that since Eve has come along, Masters is unstoppable. Eve gets in the ring with Masters and pulls mistletoe out of her boot. She smooches Masters after the match.
We get a video package of the “Tribute to the Troops” program and the Superstars’ trip overseas. Really nice package and I hope people tuned in to watch. After that package, there were a number of “USA” chants in the arena. God bless our fighting men and women at home and abroad.
Cole and King recap the night so far. DX was found guilty in Little People’s Court, and Sheamus is in action with MVP tonight. We go backstage again, where the Bellas are with the tiger from the beginning of the show. Miz is with Santa and criticizing Santa for not giving him a pair of pants he wanted when he was nine years old. He wants to be the next WWE champion, as well as a tour bus, a house in Malibu, and 2 hotter girlfriends. Santa pulls his beard down and we find out Santa’s being played by IRS. The blonde woman comes screaming in and attacks the tiger again (I finally got that joke – duh). IRS will be watching the Miz closely. Damon makes his way into the picture, and IRS says baseball players are the biggest tax cheats of them all. Mae Young gets Johnny under the mistletoe and wrestles him to the ground and smooches him. King calls her the Ghost of Mrs. Claus.
Sheamus v MVP is the next match. Sheamus makes his way out to the ring. I have to admit, not a lot of heel heat for someone who’s supposed to be heel as he makes his way to the ring.
Next week, Timbaland is the guest host. We’re supposed to expect shock value.
As we get set for the match we get a recap of the Cena/Sheamus match at TLC and the ending in particular.
MVP is out next for this match coming out of commercial. Cole and King give MVP credit for wanting to earn his shot at the title. Let’s see what MVP can do. It’s a sign of confidence from the other stars now that Cena has been beaten by Sheamus.
Sheamus wastes little time, hitting MVP with heavy clubbing blows in the corner and big shots. MVP gets a few shots to the midsection, but Sheamus puts him back down. Sheamus hits that backbreaker/chokeslam move and stalks MVP. Sheamus whips MVP into the corner and goes for a splash but MVP moves out of the way. MVP bounces off the ropes but Sheamus telegraphs his next move. MVP gets a kick and Sheamus is down. MVP gives the crowd that look and goes for “Ballin’” but Sheamus hit him with a big boot first. Sheamus hits that “border toss” like move for three and the win.
After the match, Cena hits the ring out of nowhere with a mic in hand. Cena says “He owes me a rematch, right?” Cena wants to collect on the rematch clause, right here and right now. After a staredown, Sheamus teases getting in the ring to fight but then exits.
Vince comes in to see Johnny Damon and says he’s done a great job. Vince says “We just heard John Cena issue a challenge, what are you going to do about it?” Damon makes Cena vs. Sheamus official for next week’s Raw. Damon asks Vince about Bret Hart, and McMahon calls it a bah humbug question and leaves. Damon’s looking for mouthwash after the kissing session with Mae Young.
Miz is up next in a one-on-one match with Santino Marella – or is it Santino Claus tonight? Santino Claus is handing out gifts to the audience as he makes his way to the ring. He gets on the microphone to sing that “Santino Claus is coming to town.” It’s not good news for the Miz because Santino Claus checked his list and doesn’t feel like being nice.
Miz attacks after that. Miz is choking Santino with the ropes and follows it up with a neckbreaker. Miz is fully in control of this match from the start. He rams Santino into the corner and stomps him. Miz is getting heel heat by this point. He tries to get a running splash in the corner but Santino moved out of the way. Santino gets an armdrag takedown, and then climbs the ropes. He misses his move off the ropes and Miz gets the Skullcrushing Finale for the win.
After the match, Miz starts stomping on the gift bag and throws it out of the ring. Miz is the Grinch that stole Christmas according to Cole.
We get a recap of the DX incident in Little People’s Court. They must be killing time for some reason.
Big Show is backstage and is asked what his reaction is to the Christmas show? He’s calling out Santa Claus and he wants his Christmas wish. That’s up next.
Coming out of commercial, we’re told that Cena and Sheamus will battle for the title next week. We also get a trailer of Marine 2 with Ted DiBiase.
Big Show makes his way to the ring. Cole calls him the Grinch and mentions that it would be impossible to buy for Show. Show gets on the mic and says that Johnny Damon promised that someone’s wish would be granted by one of the secret Santas. He wants the real Santa to give me my wish, now. Out comes Santa with the Bellas.
Santa gets on the stick and wishes everyone a Merry Christmas. He turns to Show and says “and oh my, you’re a large little boy.” Big Show kneels down and lets Santa sit on his lap. Show says he’s been a good boy, and Santa asks “what would you like?” Show says he wants Jericho back on Raw. Santa says that Jericho is such a bad boy, and he makes Santa sick. With some convincing from Show, Santa gives in and says “since this is what you want so much, Jericho is back next week.”
Out comes ‘Swoggle from under the ring to reveal that Santa is Jericho. A miniature DX Army comes out from under the ring to surround Jericho. A scrum ensues between the DX Army and Jerishow. One of the little guys hangs on to Jericho while he screams “get him off of me” and Big Show sideslams him. Show picks him up by one foot and lifts him out of the ring.
‘Swoggle ends up alone with JeriShow, and starts to warm up the band. ‘Swoggle hands out some Sweet SHIN Music, and gets scooped up for a chokeslam by Show. DX rolls out to confront Show and Jericho and the two teams battle. DX throws out Jericho, then double suplex the Big Show and discard him from the ring. Swoggle gets back in with them and the three look at each other.
Triple H grabs the stick and says “let’s squash him.” HBK says “We can’t squash him, it’s Christmas.” Trips wants to squash ‘Swoggle for Christmas but Shawn talks him out of it and says that the little guy is growing on him. Trips doesn’t hate him as much either anymore. HBK said ‘Swoggle had to do something big, and what he just did was big. HBK goes on and asks “Can we keep him? I’ll feed him, clean out his cage, take him for walks…” Trips says “we can’t let him in DX because of height requirements.” Shawn whispers something in Trips’ ear and Trips says “ok, here’s the deal – you’re the DX mascot.” DX and ‘Swoggle do the chop together and celebrate with the fans as the show ends.
To me it was a so-so Raw tonight. Maybe it was the pre-Christmas lull, but the show wasn’t great, although it wasn’t horrible either. It will be interesting to see what happens with Cena vs. Sheamus next week. This is a critical decision point for what they want Sheamus to be…a flash in the pan or a serious long-term main eventer.
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A 37 year old engineer by day that enjoys writing on the side. I go back a lot of years in pro wrestling, from the old NWA/WCW days and the 80's WWF up til today with TNA, WWE, and occasionally some of the other independent federations. Primarily my scene here will be TNA, but expect a little bit of everything in terms of opinions and recaps in the world of pro wrestling from me.
I’m sorry, I disagree. This Raw was atrocious.
There have been many times I’ve felt a little bit dumber for watching, but this was the first time I’ve felt outright insulted.
I gotta agree with Drew on this one. This was a lousy Raw IMO. I wish Hornswoggle would just get lost somewhere and never come back.
In hindsight, you guys are right. The DX/Hornswaggle thing was way overdone and the Tiger thing was just out of place and maybe a bit tasteless. If I understand, the woman involved in the tiger bit is someone who is in FCW and I guess they were trying to get her some exposure on the show – but chasing around someone in a tiger outfit with a golf club?